雅思考试备考：7.5分雅思作文剖析，很多同学对于这个问题有疑问和不解，那么下面就跟着中国教育在线的小编详细了解一下吧。

Band 7.5

Some people believe that there should be fixed punishment for each type ofcrime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, andthe motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account whendeciding on the punishment. Discuss both these views and give your ownopinion.

Fixing punishments for each type of crime has been a debatable issue. Thereare many arguments supporting both views, those for and those against fixedpunishments.

On the one hand, fixed punishments will have a deterring effect on society.Individuals knowing that they will be subject to a certain punishment if theyare convicted with a given crime, will reconsider committing this act in thefirst place. This deterring effect also leads to social stability and security,through minimizing the number of crime committed. If people knew they would beable to convince the court or the jury of a reason for having committed thecrime they are accused of, penal decisions would be largely arbitrary. Thiswould result into criminals getting away with their crimes and into a high levelof injustice caused by the subjective approach of different courts.

On the other hand, taking the circumstances of a crime and its motivationinto consideration is a prerequisite for establishing and ensuring justice andequity. A person killing in self-defense cannot be compared to a serial killer,moving from one victim to the next.

In my opinion and intermediary position between both solutions is theperfect way to establish and ensure justice and equity. There have to be fixedpunishments for all crimes. however, criminal laws have to provide for a minimumand a maximum for the punishment and the laws also have to foresee certain casesof exemptions. An example for setting minimum and maximum penalties isCompletion Law where a person being held liable of a crime under this law willbe convicted to pay a fine, according to the harm caused by the violation andthe profit gained by the violator through committing the crime.As for theexemptions, in some countries the law exempts thiefs stealing food during aperiod of famine taking into consideration the distress and hunger. Also aperson killing in self-defense will be exempted from punishment.

这篇7.5分的雅思写作例文可以说各方面都做的还不错，但是在paraphrase这一点仍有失误，作者应该把penalty早早提到文章的前面替换掉一些频繁出现的punishment,同时应该多收集点其它的词，如：castigation, penalization, discipline等。但是他关于收集犯罪类的词汇上显然homework做的比较足，所以用了很多专业的词汇：

jury 陪审团; penal 刑事的; arbitrary 武断的;injustice 不公正; subjective approach主观的方法; prerequisite 前提; self-defense 正当防卫; serial killer 连环杀手; exemption 豁免;liable 应负法律责任的; convict 定罪; violation 违背。

从语法上来看，这篇essay 除使用了定语从句外，还有大量的分词短语作定语，如：

Individuals knowing that they will be subject to a certain punishment ifthey are convicted with a given crime, will reconsider committing this act inthe first place. (现在分词)

A person killing in self-defense cannot be compared to a serial killer,moving from one victim to the next. (现在分词)

according to the harm caused by the violation and the profit gained by theviolator through committing the crime. (过去分词)

被动语态也有展现：

a person being held liable of a crime under this law will be convicted topay a fine.

这两个语法点都被囊括在了几个写作高分语法点中，所以同学在掌握好了以上六条建议之后应该在这些写作高分语法句型上花些精力和时间，以助自己的高分梦想早日实现。

最后强调下，写作时论证一定要全面，尤其是对于双观点的题型。 更是要掌握好两方论证的顺序和篇幅分配，最后在总结时要注意是否和正文思路吻合。

总之，以上的7.5分雅思写作范文在语法、词汇上都错的很不错，唯一的小瑕疵就是有些词汇过渡重复使用，而且整体的句式运用相当的丰富，这都是以上这篇7.5分雅思写作范文的优势处。

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